The 2nd Mission

The Boy who became a Pokemon Master

Brring! Brring!, went the alarm clock, the alarm clock of Ash Ketchum. It was Ash’s 10th birthday and he decided it was time for him to become a man. He grabbed the alarm clock and through it at the wall. He went to the closet and grabbed another one out.

He turns the TV on and puts it on the adult channel and gets relaxed. He thinks to himself “Today’s the day I become a man...” “Honey, watch are you watchiinng?!” Ash’s mum Delia called out. Ash started panicking, “Um, Porn, Pornke, POKEMON!” “Oh, well since you turned 10 today, and your so interested in watching Pokemon, then you can start your pokemon journey” Delia said. “Oh Fuck...”

Ash got dressed into some tight clothes and walked out of the house. “Sorry Honey!, I packed that back pack 5 years ago, sorry about it being a little tight!” “Love youuuu”. So Ash walked off and started his Journey. 10 Minutes later, Ash arrived at the Professor of Kanto, Professor Oaks Lab. He saw happy other 10 yr olds running down the steps and faintly heard what they said. “I love you Squirtle, I’ll love you forever!” “Charmander, I’m gonna make you grow up to be big and strong” “Bulbasaur, I’m gonna shove your bulb up my ass” Ash thought “Wtf?!.

As he walked up the stairs he decided to get a Squirtle so he could sit on its shell. He walked in. “Professor, I’m ready for my pokemon now” “Fuck off” The professor replied. “If you want a pokemon, go catch one yourself” And Oak chucked a poke ball at him. “But please wai... Wait, Oak, are you wearing any underpants?” “Get out I tell you!” Ash pulls out the running shoes his mother had gave him from his bag and put them on. He held down B and he was OFF!. He ran towards route 27. He ran through the pixilated grass and Gary, his rival, had an ! pop out of his head. Then all of a sudden, battle music started and they had to battle. He chucked out squirtle. “Hey!, I wanted a Squirtle” “ Ya snooze, ya loose, smelly” Ash needed a Pokemon and fast. I know, and he chucked his poke ball into the bushes.

He ran into the bush’s and picked out the poke ball, “Yes I caught something!”. He pushed start and the menu came up. He opened up the poke ball and a Pikachu popped out. The pokedex read out. “Pikachu, the electric mouse pokemon, It evolves from Pichu, Oh fuck, Information from the next series, Johto, no no no, Malfunction.”

“Dam”
As Ash was walking along he saw a possible red headed prostitute. He then thought what his mum told him. [Flash Back] “Remember Ash, If you see a possible prostitute, BANG HER!. How do you think your father made you?”

Ash knew what to do. She was near a lake bending over, getting undressed. He started closing in quietly. Splashh! Ash had pushed her into the water and stolen her bike. Ash murmured to himself “ I hope I did you proud mum...”


Page 2 Off to Viridian City

Ash, with Pikachu on his shoulder, he rides off with the red heads bike. He starts wondering what a Trainer like him would do. He thought he should go to the Poke Mart and buy some Poke Balls. As he rides through the forest, he accidentally walks over to a Fearow’s nest and “accidentally” ate one and put 3 in his pocket.

He got on his bike and started riding away. But he heard some Spearows flying after him and he needed to escape. “Pikachu, THUNDERBOLT!” “Pikkaaa CHUUUUUUUU!” Pikachu’s thunderbolt turned them all into fried bird. So Ash and Pikachu sat down and talked over fried bird. When they finished, they went to the pokemon centre to heal Pikachu. When he got there, Police Officer Jenny was looking for two Paedophile’s in a Gang Bang group called Team Rocket. Ash walked into the Pokemon Centre and gave his Pikachu to 1 of 100000 Nuse Joy and Chansey took it into a room with a needle light on top.
Ash, scared for his TV, that his mum might find out what he was watching, he remembered that he had a Pikachu getting healed. Then he remembered he walked 5 km from the pokemon centre without noticing. So there Ash stood there, in silence and started talking in his head with his conscience. “Hmmm, I wonder weather I should go back and get the Pikachu that saved my life...?” “Dont bother about him, just eat your yummy eggs” “Good point, but remember what officer jenny said?” “No” “Oh yea we didn’t show that scene did we...” [Flash Back] “Ash remember, that Team Rocket might try to abduct you so you should carry your one and only hope of not getting fisted up the ass, Pikachu”. Ash ran back as fast as he could, meanwhile...

Above Viridian City, there was a floating Meowth shaped air balloon. And on it was a big red R. I belonged to none other than Team Rocket. On the air balloon was Jessie, a woman with ugly pink hair shaped like Elvis’s but longer, James, the man with purple bowl shaped hair and Meowth, the pokemon that could talk.

“Jessie, look at that boy’s fresh asssss” James stated. “Mm hm hm hm hm hm, yes, I think we should grab him” said Jessie. “bags him first!” screamed horny Meowth.

As Ash ran, he noticed the air turning cold and the sun going down. The sweat flew from his face. He didn’t want to be probed, and he needed his Pikachu fast. Then, from the corner of his eye, he saw a glimpse of orange. Ash decided to ignore it and keep running. Then it appeared again at the corner of his other eye. Ash knew who it was, what it was, it was the Red Head...

she screamed out “How dare you steal my bike and push me in the water, I’m gonna kill you!” Ash didn’t know what to do, so he grabbed the egg and chucked it at her face. “ Wooahh!” she screamed blinded and fell down a hill.
Ash arrived at the pokemon centre and Pikachu just came out of the room with needle scars on his ass. Are you ok buddy? “Pika” said Pikachu happily. The red head stormed into the room and said “Thanks, you stole my bike and chuck a half developed fearow at my face, how are you going to repay me?” she asked pissed off. “Would you like to come with me and Pikachu?” Ash asked. She replied “ Yea I’ll come with you for 20$ but no intercourse...
Page 3 Pewter city

So Ash, Pikachu and the new person in the group, Misty are walking down a route which will take them straight to Pewter City so Ash can get his first badge. On there way, Ash spotted a baby Lugia, and he thought of all the powerful possibilities of catching and owning one. “Pikachu, Thunder, with all your power!” “Pika”. The Thunder hit the baby Lugia and then there was smoke. The power of the Thunder had cooked Lugia! So they started eating it. “This was the best plan I’ve ever thought of.” Ash hears that the Gym Leader, Brock focuses on Rock Type pokemon. So he finds out that Pikachu can learn Iron Tail. “Misty, I’m leaving you in the wood all alone with no one to protect you, By” said Ash as he ran off.

“Iron Tail, Iron Tail, Iron Tail” screamed Ash, frustrated. “:Pikachu, nooo, I don’t want you learning Focus Punch, or Hyper Beam, which to moves you cant learn. “Pika???” said Pikachu confused holding up a Focus Punch. Ash, angry walked over to Pikachu, slowly and strong. Pikachu said with a dazed face “Pika”. “PIIIIKA CHUUUUUU” [Birds Fly from the forest]

As Ash is training Pikachu (Or whatever evil, unthinkable thing he’s doing) Team Rocket are floating over them. “Jessie and Meowth, why don’t we grab that Pikachu instead of grabbing his fresh bum?” “James, how dare you say we don’t grab his fresh bum!” said Jessie angry. “Meowth, Meowth, I think James has a good point”. “Fine” said Jessie not impressed. So they thought of an evil scheme.

Ash walks into the Pewter Gym, and battles Brock. He won. After that, TR stole Pikachu “MWAHAHAHAAHA” they screamed until they got thunderbolted. He’s about to leave when a young, rich boy and said “Can I travel with you?” But then Brock appeared and asked the same thing. “Hmm” he thought in his head. Black Asian Guy, Rich Kid, Black Asian Guy, Rich Kid, Black Asian Guy..., I choose you BROCK!” He screamed.

Now, this story of pokemon has to come to an end. Oh and your probably wandering where and what happened to Misty, well lets say she got taken hostage by some frisky Caterpie...